


Ron Misunderstands Everything

by foodwineanddesign



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Eavesdropping, F/M, Gossip, Light Dom/sub, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 16:42:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29317299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foodwineanddesign/pseuds/foodwineanddesign
Summary: Little does Ron Weasley know, that all of the bits and pieces of gossip that he's heard Hermione tell people, will lead him to a very wrong conclusion.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Charlie Weasley
Comments: 2
Kudos: 59





	Ron Misunderstands Everything

“I know he’s your brother, Gin, so tell me if this gets weird for you.” Ron could hear Hermione’s voice faintly up the stairs of Grimmauld Place.

“I just never thought that you would want to make that move. I don’t want details, but, I do want details,” his sister squeaked. Ron thought he could hear her bouncing in excitement.

“Right? I thought he wouldn’t be interested, but we’re both back in England now, and I can’t stop thinking about him! I didn’t think I would actually ever go for a ginger, I really didn’t.”

Ginny scoffed, and Ron crept closer, trying to avoid the squeakiest fourth tread down. He missed the next part of what she said.

“…and GOD but his hands. I want them wrapped right around my waist, and what I wouldn’t give to know how those fingers feel in my-“

A shriek split the air, laughter from both women followed. “I’ve hit my limit, ‘Mione! I’m glad you’re finally finding someone you want to be with, but he’s still my sibling. Come on, we need to start cooking. Ron should be home from that MACUSA trip soon.”

A door creaked open on the level above and Ron frantically followed the giggles down to the kitchen, a firm smirk in place. So, Hermione had finally decided that he’s the wizard for her? Well, he’d be happy to have the position, so to speak. Time to surprise her with an earlier return home.

***  
“He is back soon, right Harry?”

“’Course, ‘Mione, he’s supposed to get in any minute now. International Portkeys take a bit, you know.”

Hermione sighed and leaned into her best friend as he slung an arm over her shoulders. “I do, you’re right. I guess that trip from Lyon yesterday scrambled me a bit.”

Harry chuckled and teased her with a poke to the waist. “Or is it the chance to see a certain Weasley brother for the first time in a while?”

Ron watched through the cracked kitchen door as she flushed brighter red than his hair and pulled away. “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean, Harry. Besides, don’t you need to get the table set? The whole clan will be descending on your house in the next hour and we haven’t duplicated nearly enough of the silver!”

The Boy Who Lived shook his head, still laughing under his breath and aimed straight for the door. 

“Ron! You’re in early! Hey ‘Mione, Ginny, look who got here faster than expected!”

Ron didn’t have time to fully process Harry’s insinuation because his arms were shortly full of curly brunette witch, his sister close behind.

“You’re back! So good to see you Ronald!” He drew back enough to see Hermione’s eyes bright and sparkling with glee. He smirked and shoved his hair back, aiming for the suave, pick up artist persona he’d used to get the ladies fawning over him in New York. 

“Yeah, well, you know, I had some tricks up my sleeve, and the Ministry let me breeze through security, Order of Merlin, and all.”

She shook her head at him and released a huff, backing up to let Ginny embrace him. “Honestly, you shouldn’t use that to affect such a little thing like travel. It’s not proper. But I am glad you’re here early, now you can help Harry with the table.”

Ginny pinched his cheek as she drew away from him and ruffled the hair that still stuck up. “Best do as she says, ‘Mione is just as concerned about her table as Mum.”

Twin pops sounded in the garden as they made their way back into the kitchen. Hermione stirred a few pots with a flick of her wand, as the back door burst open to Fred and George practically diving in, and slamming it shut.

“Quickly now! Can’t let ‘im-“

“He’ll be proper pissed at us-“

“-once he finds out!”

“If he finds out!”

“Too right, Gred.”

“That color blind spell was brilliant, Forge.”

Ron blinked at them, and shrugged it off. “Hullo, I’m back!”

The twins turned their pleased as punch expressions to him and immediately bounded over.

“Ickle Ronnekins, back from the States!”

“Heard you had a right good time there, didn’t you?”

“All the heart breaking-“

“All the skirt chasing-“

“Enough!” Ginny broke in with a pointed look to Hermione. She nodded to the table. “Set it, now, Bill and Fleur should be over any minute, and the rest are due in half an hour.”

George turned to the task, grabbing Ron’s arm to pull him along. Fred checked the back door again, just in time for another pop of Apparition to resound throughout the garden, and the Floo wooshed softly as he let out a whoop.

“George, it worked! We need to get that one into the shop, it will sell faster than a Firebolt!”

Ron tore away to the window to find Percy standing on the dingy garden. At least, he thought it was Percy, because even the vibrant green of his hair couldn’t disguise the haughty look of displeasure on his face as he caught sight of the onlookers.

“Let me in this instant, George,” he asserted. “I don’t know what you’ve done, but the world has been shades of sepia since my shower and I know you’re to blame for it!”

Fred grimaced. “Georgie isn’t available at the moment, brother mine, so sorry! Not quite sure why your world looks so shitty, certainly can’t be anything he’s done. Nope, can’t be sweet, innocent George!”

Percy raged against the firmly locked door and Ron guffawed as he turned to show George his success. The kitchen was empty for a moment, then Bill swung a brightly laughing Victoire and bubble gum pink haired Teddy into the room. 

“Uncle Ron! Uncle Ron!” 

“Hey little brother, you’re home already! Even beat Charlie getting back, and he’s still on the same side of the Atlantic.” Bill clamped a hand down on his shoulder and Ron’s knees nearly gave out from the kid’s throwing themselves at him bodily.

“That’s what happens when you’re famous,” he wheezed. Victorie tried to squeeze him as hard as she could every time, and she got stronger than he expected while he was gone. Bill twerked an eyebrow at him and nodded, shuffling over to the stove.

“Fleur followed us through, I think she and Hermione are catching up a bit in the parlor if you want to say hello. Ah, Percy! You’re looking rather- er” 

Percy huffed, having finally forced his way into the house. “I’m looking at nothing of actual color, everything is shit brown and I know these two are to blame! Tell me your curse-breaking has a counter spell, I beg of you Bill!”

As the twins basked in their success, the children cheering them on, Ron escaped Percy’s tirade to greet his sister in law.

***

“And? Have you spent time together since then?” Fleur’s delicate whisper floated in and out. Ron slowed his step. She must be talking to ‘Mione, he reasoned, and waited with bated breath for a response.

“No, we haven’t seen each other since then. We’ve both been out of the country, but we have owl’d a fair amount. I just can’t stop thinking of what could have happened then, if we had continued.” 

Ron’s heart skipped a beat. It must be that goodbye they shared, two years ago, when he left for his Auror exchange and she moved to France for her research. He remembered looking into her eyes and thinking of kissing her again, even though they had decided that they really ought to not be in such a long distance relationship. Or, that’s what he thought she meant when she told him she didn’t think it was a good idea to start dating again, just because she had finally graduated Hogwarts. 

They hadn’t really dated. There was a summer spent cleaning up from the war, a few kisses and close moments curled up together by the fire, and then he and Harry were off for training and Hermione back to Scotland for eighth year. They had stayed in touch, but ‘Mione always wrote the longest letters, and Harry barely had time to write a few lines in return, Merlin willing, if anything most of the time. Training was exhausting and Ron occasionally signed his name to one of Harry’s letters, but he could have sworn there was a moment when they parted for their foreign travels, when he could have made a move. 

“He is as good a kisser as his brother, yes?” Fleur’s inquiry had Ron’s head spinning.

“Yes, if you mean that he’s fantastic, then yes, quite,” Hermione gushed. Ron preened as quietly as he could.

“And if you’re certain that he feels the same, even with the distance-“

“oh yes, I’m certain. He’s not exactly subtle. I’m a bit nervous with Molly around tonight. She’s going to just push at him about marriage and settling down, now that he’s back home.”

Fleur’s laughter rang through the hall. “Then you will be very lucky, if he’s anything like my Bill. The Weasley men are not small, ma cherie. You will have, how you say, your hands full?” 

Hermione’s voice was hushed, with a small groan in response. “As long as it’s not the only part of me that he fills, I can’t wait.”

His jaw dropped. He knew they hadn’t gone that far, but he didn’t think she had wanted to! Now that he knew she was looking forward to being full of him, then who was he to stand in his own way?

“That day that they all played Quidditch at the Burrow, and I was reading on the sidelines, gosh, Fleur, you saw when he took his shirt off! That line of red that I just want to lick my way down. I cannot wait to get him alone tonight, I really can’t.”

“I know, all of that flying, and playing sport, he’s quite fit.” 

A gentle smack resounded and they practically tittered. “He’s your brother in law! Why were you looking?”

Ron could nearly hear her shrug, “I’m married, Hermione, I’m not dead. Come , they’ll come looking for us. You wanted my help with the dacquoise?”

Their heels resounded through the foyer and Ron turned back towards the kitchen to avoid being caught. A sharp knock at the door curtailed their progress and his escape. 

Fleur turned the ornate knob and the Weasley matriarch bundled through, quickly followed by her husband laden with boxes and bags, and finally Charlie. Ron faked making his way to his mum as though he had just heard the door, catching sight of Fleur and Hermione helping Arthur with the packages, while his brother closed the door and grinned at their welcoming committee.

“Mum, I’m home a bit earlier, just for you!” Ron announced, hoping to cover the fact that he distinctly could not possibly have been in the kitchen to greet his parents so quickly.

Molly gushed over him, peppering his face with kisses, worrying aloud at how much he had grown and changed in the last two years. His cheek was smarting from her pinch as he watched Charlie insist on relieving Fleur of her burden and troop up the stairs after Hermione, Arthur’s arms finally free to embrace his youngest son.

Molly bustled all of them into the kitchen, sweeping everyone into the warmest spot, nattering on about all the little things to do to finish the meal.

***

The Weasleys gathered around the table, finally set, Percy’s hair returned to its normal bright color and his face set in a typical scowl. Ron glanced around. “I’ll just go find ‘Mione then, get her arse down here for dinner, shall I?”

He slipped out of the kitchen, missing Ginny and Fleur’s tense postures, but hearing Arthur’s request to grab Charlie while he was upstairs. “He offered to put away all of those Christmas presents, keep ‘em hidden from these little scoundrels. Probably found a good spot in the attic.”

Ron perked up as he thought of Hermione’s earlier wish to get him alone tonight. She must be waiting, he reasoned, waiting for me to come find her. She’s definitely more subtle than I am, certainly wouldn’t want to make a big deal of our reunion. 

He reached the third landing and paused at the cracked door to what had become Hermione’s bedroom while in England. He saw her turn her back to the door, moving towards the bed with her hands behind her, fiddling with something. As her hands dropped, he shifted closer, trying to be as quiet as possible. Aurors skill, that was, and dead useful, especially when sneaking about for a rendezvous with a witch.

He caught a glimpse of her jumper shifting over her head, and then his view and attention was commandeered by the sight of her chest, entirely nude now, and fingers pinching each nipple. In the next breath, Ron could have sworn he heard her softly moaned Vanishing spell and then he could see that her jeans had disappeared as well. 

What the bloody hell was this? She wasn’t looking for him, wasn’t waiting for him before getting started on herself. Ron moved to open the door and join her when a deeper voice stopped him cold. 

“Missed me then, didn’t you? So fucking wet for me, aren’t you? Such a good little slut. Show me, how do you touch yourself when you think of your Sir?”

His jaw dropped. Hermione, his ‘Mione pulled her legs under her on the bed and split her knees open wide, just as Charlie moved into view, right hand stroking his cock. Ron couldn’t move, couldn’t tear himself away from the sight of this wonderfully exposed woman and his older brother. 

What was Charlie doing, talking to ‘Mione like that? How disgraceful, how positively-

“Please Sir, please,” she begged. Ron’s eyes bulged as her hand reached down to flick at the top of her cunt. Her back arched and she pulled more insistently at the remaining nipple in hand. Charlie knelt in front of her, hand still moving over himself and brought her face to his with a consuming kiss.

“Touch yourself for me, my little toy. I want to watch you come for me, just like you do when you think of me.” Hermione arched her back, releasing her breast to place two fingers just on the outside of her opening and push. Charlie’s teeth, lips, and soon face buried into her chest, one hand working himself over, and the other fixing itself around her neck, holding her in place. 

She whimpered, legs tightening, fingers frantically playing with herself, never quite pushing past the entrance to her quim. He pulled back, kissed her long and hard once more and began to count. 

“Five, four, three, two, one….now.”

She crested on his command, the cry of pleasure that he tore from her swallowed by his kiss. Ron couldn’t stand to watch any more as Charlie’s hand slipped from the nape of her neck to slip between her legs and replaced her fingers with a quick slip into her cunt. The cry of pleasure that followed haunted Ron down the stairs, too embarrassed at his assumptions. 

***

He rushed back down the stairs as quietly as he could and back to his seat at the table, head firmly focused on the floorboards.

Arthur glanced up, “Ah, did you find Charlie, then?”

“Yeah, uh, in the attic, of course, he’ll be down shortly.”

Ginny quirked an eyebrow and exchanged a firmly not believing look with Fleur. Ron dipped his head further and selected his favorites from the dinner spread. 

A minute later, a flushed Charlie, and beaming Hermione made their way into the kitchen. They skirted the edge of the table and sat across from Ron, who was fascinated, absolutely flabbergasted that he hadn’t studied the knots in the planks of the table before.

“Excellent, now that Ron’s fetched our last two, we can officially welcome everyone back home! Charlie, from Romania, Hermione from France, and Ronald, back at last from the States. So wonderful to have you all here. Been a while,” Molly proclaimed.

A chorus of cheers rose up, Weasleys all drinking to a toast, and beginning to chat. Hermione turned to Fleur, who had a little Victorie on her knee, and the two women connected their gaze for a moment before bursting into giggles. Ron went red again and turned his attention to the other side of the table.

Which was not one bit useful when his mother started in on him. “Ronald, now you’re ready to start looking for a nice girl to settle down with, right? All of that womanizing hogwash in the press while you were in New York, it got it out of your system. I know there’s a lovely little Miss Brown who wouldn’t mind if you owl’d, hmm?” 

Charlie grinned at his discomfort, and Ron could have punched the smug look off his face. “Right Mum, yeah, hogwash. Just a case of miscommunication. A big misunderstanding is what that was.”

Molly smiled, satisfied. “Excellent, now Charlie – “

“Mum, no, I’m good, thanks.”

Her face immediately took on a sterner countenance. “Charles Weasley, you are much more in need of a wife than your brother there, and he just confessed to being ready to become more serious about a girl! Don’t you think it’s time you do the same?”

Ron swallowed hard at the smirk on his brothers face, and watched, petrified, as Charlie gathered his defense against their mother’s meddling. “ I’m good Mum, because I have been more serious about a girl. Woman, rather. I’m tied, Mum, honest, you can ask her if you don’t believe me.”

Arthur extended a hand to catch Molly’s head before it hit the wall behind her as she swooned in her chair and the table went silent.

“You have,” asked Ginny, mischievously. “Well, if we’re going to have to ask her, you had better invite her over to verify.”

Hermione turned halfway in her seat to meet Ginny’s eyes and announced calm as could be “No need. I’m already here.”

Ron had absolutely, definitely, would swear it on Merlin’s bloody ballsack, misunderstood everything.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all liked this little Charmione nugget. The plotbunny wouldn't get out of my head for a while. I haven't posted any works in over a decade, but if I do in the future, it will probably be Hermione centric because that's just what I read.


End file.
